Tuesday, August 31, 2010

A new hope!

Many people don't really know what a nurse does. Most people think all we do is wipe bums and put people on bedpans. Being in cancer care, most of my patients are self-sufficient and I don't go anywhere near their bums. I'm sure they're thankful for this as much as I am. One thing I do that would surprise many (as I see my patients and their families are surprised when they find out) is bone marrow transplants.

The mere word 'transplant' makes you think the procedure is very complicated and the doctor would have to do it. But to be honest, it's very similar to a blood or platelet transfusion, is done at the bedside and is done by your nurse. The doctor is only present for autologous transplants, where the patients gets their own cells back, and that's because of the preservative present in the cells.

I always feel very honored to be the person to give someone their stem cells. It's giving them new life, new hope. Hope for a cancer free future. Hope to live to see their grandchild be born. Hope to live to graduate high school. Hope to see another Christmas. Hope for so many things. And I am a part of it.

I won't lie. Even after all this time the transplant process chokes me up. Usually there's many family members present, pics are being taken. It's a big deal. I spike the cells and although my patients don't know, I say a little prayer for them as I begin to infuse their cells. I only let myself feel good vibes and positive thoughts.

So the next time you think of what a nurse does, maybe you'll realize that we do a lot more than people realize. We help give people new life. New hope.

Man I love my job .....

Monday, August 16, 2010

Breaking Points

This week I have hit a breaking point. Well 2 actually. A breaking point in my TTC (trying to conceive) journey and a breaking point in my weight gain. With respect to TTC --- my husband and I have been trying for many months now. Our one year anniversary is fast approaching at which time we will see a specialist. For the last number of months I have been charting (for those of you interested go to FertilityFriend.com) and using OPKs (ovulation predictor kits). Still, nothing is working. I feel TTC has started to overwhelm me. I had a little emotional breakdown with my husband the other day, so we both decided to scale back our efforts for the moment. No more thermometer, no more ovulation strips. Just me & him. Trying to enjoy the last couple of months of our first year of marriage. We'll deal more with TTC after seeing the specialist. That was my first breaking point.

Then came my weight. I'm getting so tired of waking up and having absolutely nothing to wear. Tired of feeling awkward in my own skin. So I decided to count Weight Watcher points again. This time I'm doing something a little different though. I'm getting my whole family in on it! We have a little weight loss challenge going on. A friendly little wager. We are doing weekly weigh-ins similar to the Biggest Loser and whoever has the largest % weight loss in the end, wins the prize money. First week went well. I lost 4.6 pounds!! Being a very competitive person is helping me this time.

So I'm shifting my focus from one thing to another. I feel good about it. I'm still sad and frustrated that it seems so hard for us to get pregnant. But it is what it is. I'm leaving it in God's hands for now. I'm going to focus on getting myself healthier, emotionally and physically. The rest will fall into place.